2015.

Every year I look back on what I achieved, which poles I missed and where I can improve on for the next year. We’re all doing that right now, aren’t we? Setting up trees, wrapping presents, drowning in delicious wine and silently reflecting on our lives. Our future. Our families. This was my year of bravery. I got a new car, I pierced my ears (I was so scared), I went to Paris to see some art, and Noah started the ‘dream’ school. My business grew and with it, my passion for the digital world. I’m taking on a business partner next year and growing a few divisions, which will be my core focus for 2016.

The boys had a big year because they’d always been in the same school and sometimes in the same class. This year they struggled with being separated, but they also developed a bit of independence. Benjamin is more of an introvert, so I think he sometimes relied on Noah for companionship when he didn’t want to reach out to other children. I guess it was the same for Noah too, especially in the beginning. I’m so glad that they’ll be together again next year and can share all those same-school stories about the library or tuck shop lady, assembly and playground things. It’s going to be so good for them!

These past few months… I’ve lost a lot of time. You know when you’re reading a book but your mind wanders and you realise you haven’t absorbed the last six pages you’ve read? I felt kind of like that, but about everything. This year was the one that schooled me. Maybe you’ve had a year like this. When you decided to do everything that you’ve ever been afraid of. Being alone in a foreign city with a language barrier and no sense of direction was beyond overwhelming. I feel a hundred years older, but in a good way.

This was also the year that we legally dissolved our marriage. Our decision was based on a mutual benefit and handled with love and in friendship. A new story has begun, and I know that it’s going to be a sweet one, for all of us. We’re both excited about next year, our new projects and adventures.

I’m finishing up some work and wrapping the last presents, then I’m off to Sydney in the first week of January for business and to see some friends. I hope that you’re all finishing up too, and settling in to the holidays with your families. We’ve been writing and re-writing letters for Father Christmas for weeks, and now I’m off to the shops to buy some cookies to leave at the fireplace “in case he comes early mommy!” It really is the most wonderful time of the year x

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A day at the beach & a super easy giveaway

On Wednesday we spent the day at my new favourite beach. It’s close to Table Bay and I have no idea what it’s called, but the water is SO WARM. You can spend all day swimming like you’re in Durban or something. There are rock pools with loads of fish and crabs and other little sea creatures. I know this because every ten minutes the boys threw a newly found giant dead crab in my direction. Apparently that one never gets old. We got a new cool floaty toy from Superbalist a while back. A lot of you asked, so I wanted to let you know that you can still find it online here. PS invest in a hand pump or something. Seriously.

Screen Shot 2015-12-18 at 6.53.04 AMScreen Shot 2015-12-18 at 5.55.08 AMThe boys had such a fun time. I packed loads of sandwiches, homemade burgers and snacks the night before, so we got to the beach nice and early. I have to find out the name of this place, because the water is so shallow, so the kids can swim all day and you don’t have to worry about their safety one little bit. The dogs went nuts and were chasing the fish for hours. With everyone fully entertained, I got a nice tan and some serious downtime. I am obsessed with the beach, it is my favourite place to be (this post was not sponsored by the ocean)

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After months of hunting, I finally got a new bikini! It’s also from Superbalist (they currently own all my money) and I’m so happy with it. It’s really hard for me to find a bikini top that fits properly, and this halter neck fit is so flattering and supportive. You can find it in their swimwear section.

Screen Shot 2015-12-18 at 6.04.07 AMScreen Shot 2015-12-18 at 6.39.35 AMI also wanted to remind you guys that the #VenusOnTheGo, Venus Snap competition is still happening! They’re giving away a shopping spree prize worth R20,000 at Topshop to a very lucky girl! Enter like this:

  • Buy one of their Venus Snap razors
  • Snap a flat lay image including your Venus Snap
  • Upload it to Instagram using #VenusOnTheGo.

The winner will be announced in January so you still have loads of time to enter. I love the little pocket size razor. It’s so tiny and comes with a nifty little travel case too. Here’s an example of how to style your razor to enter the competition! I used some of my favourite beach things, but you can do a beauty, handbag or even a gym bag post too. There can only be one winner girls! Get those entries in x

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There’s a lot going on.

I hate to say that I’m busy, because really – everyone is busy. Being super busy is awful. Can we stop the glorification of busy? What I wouldn’t give to pack it all in and spend my days at the beach or in a pool instead. There is a lot going on now and every year I forget just how frantic this time of year is. Not just with work, but with the boys and their school activities. Noah enters grade ONE next year and his school is so fantastic. We’ve had orientations, class lists and school concerts. He’s had outings and prize givings and cake sales and play dates. There’s so much still to do over the next few weeks, but I love it. I love being a mom and getting everything ready for this HUGE milestone in his life. I am going to cry my mommy heart out when I see him in his first school uniform because I know just how proud and grown up he’s going to look.

Ben’s school nativity play was last night and today is HIS grade R orientation. Next year they’ll be in the same school again, which I’m ecstatic about. It was pretty hard on them to be separated this year.  It was his birthday party last week and he’s changed so much. He’s growing up too fast now and becoming a proper little awkward boy. It’s the BEST. Noah has exceeded all our expectations this year and I’m so flippen proud of both of them. I’m trying not to share too much of the boys’ lives online as they’re getting to that age where they want a bit more privacy and consideration, you know? I mean they’re in BIG school now, “mom.”

I’m dealing with a lot of business and bookkeeping admin right now which I have very little patience for. There’s two weeks of admin, work and planning to get through. I love this time of year and I’m so excited to put the tree up and start the Christmas shopping and meal planning. It really is the most wonderful time of the year. I have this huge mental list of things to be grateful for, and I’m going to make a point of writing them all down next week. This is an awful season for families who might be under financial strain or have lost loved ones this year, so count your blessings every single day – no matter how tired we all are, or how tough things may seem right now. Just a little bit longer!

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Anniversary chickens and our little family farm.

Last weekend was Graeme and I’s 6 year wedding anniversary. We weren’t really going to celebrate because we have a lot going on work and home wise at the moment. On the morning, he surprised me with a pretty necklace and we decided to take a drive out to the winelands. My mom watched the boys and G and I just took to the road with no plans which was pretty nice. We stopped at Warwick, Lanzerac (I think?) and Maison for wine and tapas with lots of giggles in between. We bought a few bottles of wine at each vineyard to start our own little collection at home. Graeme works with some of the people at Maison, and they gifted us a fancy bottle of MCC which I’ve hidden at the very top of the pantry. I still have some wine from Paris, so we’ve got a pretty fancy collection going at the moment. So fancy, that we’ll probably never drink any of it. That’s the point, right?

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I have been nagging Graeme for chickens for MONTHS. I’ve phoned around, trawled the classifieds and asked so many people where I can get a few hens. Eventually we saw some along the trip and I can’t really disclose how or where we got these chickens for YOUR OWN PROTECTION, but we left the winelands with these adorable little chicks that we’ve named “Itchy and Scratchy”

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They are the sweetest, tiniest little creatures. They make the cutest chirping noises and fall asleep on you every chance they get. Graeme has started building a nice big coop and enclosure for them, but right now they’re in the big bunny hutch with Buttons the bunny. They’ve got their own little box in there and Buttons is quite chuffed to have some friends. I’ve separated him from Pumpkin and the babies ’til they’re strong enough to all be together again. We’re also giving Buttons the snip, so him and Pumpkin need some time apart for a bit. The boys are loving the chicks! The big hutch / coop will give all the little animals some access to grass and the garden with a nice big door so the kids can climb in and out to hang out with their pets. Our vegetable garden is coming along so nicely, and one day we’ll get some eggs from these chickens too. Just building a farm here people because food is expensive!

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Noah has been put in charge of watering the veggie garden and right now we’re growing beetroot, sweet potato, cucumber, mieles, tomatoes, chillies, pumpkins, butternut, watermelon, sweet melon, patty pans, lettuce, mint, celery, sage, origanum, coriander and parsley. I have to keep planting as we go so that we have a continuous harvest once it all comes to life. It’s so important for the boys to be in touch with animals, growing food and being close to the earth like this. I can’t wait to watch these chickens grow. They’re so tame and sweet and naughty! The dogs are so confused about all of this, and Jack spends his days guarding and staring at the chicks while Daisy tries really hard to eat them every chance she gets. The garden is looking so nice at home because all the butterflies are out and there are so many trees and nests at the back. The starlings, pigeons and these tiny little green birds bath in the fish pond every afternoon. Our house must be some kind of depot for all the birds in the area because there are really just so many.

The animals and garden has added quite a bit of work for me, because I spend every afternoon watering, fussing, planting and fertilising all of it. I’m helping Pumpkin with the babies and trying to keep her cage as clean as possible while making sure that the chicks are warm and that rodents in the area don’t try get to them. It’s really nice though because I spend more time outside with the kids and less time with screens.

PS Does anyone know if you’re allowed to keep geese in the suburbs? And also chickens.

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Pumpkin bunny had bunnies.

Yesterday, 21 October I was watering some plants (you know the ones that the dogs haven’t eaten yet) and noticed the bunnies being a bit noisy like running up and down the cage a lot. When I looked, I saw a few mouse-like bald things crawling around the cage. They sorta looked like small versions of that monster in Pan’s Labyrinth. I won’t post an image because this is a family blog and I have a responsibility to not harm you, emotionally. Actually, maybe stop reading right here.

The thing with mama rabbits is that when they’re stressed out with their kits, they sort of eat them. The male (Buttons) was in the cage and this really freaked her out and her only solution was to physically decapitate her young. With her teeth. Motherhood is tough, so no judgies but I had to act super fast to save the remaining 6. Buttons was confused and a little bit frightened because A) his children were crawling around the cage and fatherhood is sometimes a bit of a shock to men and B) his wife was murdering their children.

Here’s an extract from a site on why a rabbit would do this > “If she is in the process of kindling or if she has a young litter, and then gets frightened for her life, it is well documented that she might eat her babies, destroying any evidence that would attract predators or reduce her chance of survival.”

I made a little nest box for her with ripped up blankets and some hay and moved her to a separate cage just to CALM HER THE F DOWN. Gave her some newspaper to shred, some water and food and covered the new family with a blanket in a quiet room. Amongst all of this I also took a really quick photo of the babies so I could remember them in case she ate them.

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So right now I’m on mama and baby rabbit watch. This morning all the kits are still alive and squirming and she is feeding them (mostly against her will). I trick her by putting apples and spinach in the nest box and then the babies roll around under her and get what they can very quickly. One of the babies rolled around her face and she started licking it but I thought she was chewing it, so there is still panic. We had a really long talk about motherhood and responsibilities so maybe that helped.

We cleaned out her cage today and she made a little nest for herself and drank about (I’m estimating) 17 litres of water. She’s cleaning up all her own droppings and excretions and sometimes I catch her looking over in to the nest and rubbing her chin on the outside so maybe motherhood is growing on her. We’re keeping the dogs outside and trying to keep her calm and she looks pretty happy now, so holding thumbs!

PS Does anyone want a bunny? No really we have six and they’re hella cute. I’m posting a photo a day of them to track their growth if you wanna check it out on Instagram – @therabbithaus.

 

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Family photos by Paul Clark – September 2015

My brother Paul (transmit@paulclark.co.za | 082 855 4379) is a photographer, designer, art director and video editor. He is most excellent at everything that he does (insert sibling rivalry undertones) and I am insanely jealous of his photography skills. Last weekend when we were both visiting my mom, he snapped some nice pictures of Benjamin being silly. I asked him to quickly take a picture of each of us to frame at home, and I’m so glad that I did. I’m going to frame a few of these for our corridor at home, along with some of my Paris art prints. Basically spending all my money at the framer’s this month. I love how dark and moody these pictures are, in contrast to our happy faces and dispositions. Also, how ridiculously handsome are my boys?

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A letter to my third child.

I call you my daughter, but you could be a boy. My son. My sun.

I think about you every day; the child that I want so badly. You’re the possibility. The maybe. Still, I feel you and think about you constantly. Ben wants to meet you, but Noah is unsure. He thrives on certainty and routine, but I know that he’ll love you. He’ll probably love you the most. Daddy says he’s not sure, but every time we talk about you, the right corner of his mouth turns up. He doesn’t know that I can see it, his excited anticipation. He’d love you as soon as you exist, and if you’re a girl… I know that he’ll dote over you like his first love. You’d love him straight away too. He’s such a fun dad. Such a good dad. A really good man.

I wonder how you’ll fit in here. I wanted to meet you two years ago. I wanted to have you last year, and then this year again. I want to meet you right now, but I worry. Will I be a good mom to you? Will you get enough of our time and attention? What if I don’t know how to be a mom to a daughter. What if we fight. What if I can’t protect you. How do I stop your heart from breaking? Maybe we won’t have anything in common. Maybe we’ll be exactly the same.

You already have a name. You’re either Samuel or Bethany. Maybe you’re a Julia. Or a Sebastian. Or Holden or Maree. I see a little girl with long curly brown hair and green eyes. Dad’s eyes. He’s so scared that you’ll get his nose. He hates his nose. I don’t even know what I’d do with a girl. I wonder how different it would be. I hope it wouldn’t be lonely for you, with two brothers. Maybe you’ll be a boy, my Sam. Maybe you’ll really love having two older, fiery and energetic brothers. I bet they’ll fuss over you every day, those two. Soon they’ll be able to read you stories and tell you all about the world. I bet they’d love that.

I keep feeling you. Hearing you.

I have one or two things to do before we meet. Things that will make me a better person, a better mother. I need to calm my storms because your brothers are real firecrackers, and I’m enjoying this rest. I’m getting to know them right now. They’re so wonderful, so kind. You’d really like them.

I’ll think about you again another day, another moon, another moment. I know you’re there, so I won’t be long.

 

I hope you’ll wait for me.

 

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My personal weight loss tips & tricks but probably don’t listen to me

I’ve had a few questions about weight loss lately, and it’s something I don’t talk much about. For most women (and men) your weight might be a bit personal or maybe even an issue for you. I never really struggled with my weight until about two years ago when I lost track of exactly how much pasta and comfort food I was eating. For the first time in my life, I got properly chubby. I started running and eating right and I went on this eating plan that really worked for me. I joined a gym, I ran a half marathon and I started toning up and doing some yoga too. This year I also tried juicing, which was great and that worked too. All of these things worked to some degree and helped me feel better about myself and get in to shape a bit more. I don’t think that I will keep running half marathons, or keep doing yoga (I haven’t in months) because what I’ve noticed about myself is that I really love chopping and changing and experimenting and trying new things. I’ll just be like “I’m gonna cut out sugar for 21 days and see what happens” or “I’m gonna just drink juice for 7 days and see what happens” and treat my body a bit like a gadget – something I can test at different levels. My Paris trip is getting pretty close, so I asked a friend for advice on how to drop it like it’s hot. So right now, I’m doing:

No carbs. No sugar. No dairy. 

And I am so flippen surprized at how easy it is. Note, I’m not banting. I don’t think? Well not on purpose. I think a lot of people assume that, but I’m not doing high fat, oil or cream or anything like that. I do healthy fats like avocado, eggs and fish… But that’s about it. It’s almost exactly the same diet that I did last year when I lost all that other weight. From Tuesday – Saturday I lost 3kg. I know that the weight loss will slow down, or possibly come back if I go back on carbs and sugar full time… but right now I am just playing around with this eating plan and seeing where it goes. My only cheat is that I have one cup of coffee a day with half a sugar. It’s my morning ritual, even if it’s decaf coffee… and hopefully eventually I’ll be able to take no sugar at all. So out of all the diets and experimenting and testing and playing I’ve done, here’s what I’ve learned about losing (and gaining) weight.

1. It took hundreds of meals for you to gain weight, so don’t think it’s going to take a dozen to lose all of it. The time you spent gaining that weight is the time you’ll spend (or should spend) losing it. Don’t try lose 10kg in 2 weeks – think more along the lines of  4 – 6 months. You might yo-yo in between, too.

2. If you aren’t drinking at least 10 glasses of water a day, you’re gonna take a while to see results. Your body needs water to help flush out toxins, and it keeps you full. Most of the time when I think I’m hungry, I’m actually thirsty. Drinking water while you eat also helps you eat less as you’ll feel satisfied much faster. Also, it makes your skin look great and supple, so drink up! I’ve swapped my zillion cups of tea a day for water with fresh lemon wedges.

3. You can still drink alcohol, but stick to dry wine with low sugar content. Or whiskey – whichever.

4. You need to do some serious movement for at least 45 minutes a day. Brisk walking, running, cycling, skipping, swimming – whatever your thing is.

5. You need to eat close to the earth. I haven’t eaten anything with a label and dammit it feels good. Fresh fish from my grocer, eggs, avo, vegetables, salads, soups. Apart from tinned tuna, it’s all fresh and new and organic and hormone free. Also: sugar free.

6. So many times when I felt like “I really want a cup of tea” my body was actually saying “I really want two spoons of sugar”. I didn’t want caffeine, I wanted the sweet stuff. My first two days without sugar was filled with headaches and fogginess. Sugar withdrawals are intense and it’s hard to pull through. If you want to test your body, eliminate sugar from your diet for 3 days and you’ll see just how powerful it is. Do it just for fun! (is it weird that I find this kinda stuff fun?)

7. Never eat until you’re full. Ever. Eat until just before you’re full because the fullness will come a few minutes after you stop eating. Stand up and move away from the table / your plate when you’re done eating.

8. Eat healthy fats otherwise you’ll starve. Also, if you eat healthy fats then you might not (I don’t) get cravings for bread or sweets. I’m not saying that bread and sweets are the devil, because they’re NOT, but I think they should be viewed as treats for some people, and not a daily staple. I eat a lot of eggs, avo and fish. For the moment, I’ve stopped eating fruit and view these as bread and sweets now too. Special treats.

9. Try keep a 2-ingredient plate. Eg Just avo and an egg. Or just green beans and carrots. Simplifying my food and going back to basics and eating them in their true, raw form has been such a treat for me. After spending years working with complicated dishes at home and at restaurants, containing dozens of ingredients per plate… I find great minimalist comfort in placing two clean ingredients on a plate and eating them straight away.

10. Subsidize with vegetable juices and smoothies. I order a ‘lifestyle’ juice pack from a local company every month and keep them in the freezer for days when I know I’m going to be busy or running around. They fill you up and they’re full of goodness. Juices have saved me from many garage pies.

So right now, a typical day for me is:

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Breakfast: Half an avo & boiled egg OR Fried mushrooms & a boiled egg

Snacks: I drink so much water now that I don’t really snack, but if I do, I have a few baby carrots

Lunch: Tin of tuna & half an avo OR 2 eggs & grilled mushroom & tomato OR Tuna and green beans

Dinner: Grilled hake or kingklip or salmon with a green veg – broccoli, cauliflower, brussel sprouts or cucumber NOTE > don’t eat dinner after 7pm. I eat supper at 5:30 or 6pm every day

If you’re super serious about losing weight and want to see the initial results pretty fast, then I’d suggest something along these lines depending on your current health / BMI and recommendations from your doctor. Medicine and hormones also affect weight gain and loss, so check these with your doctor too. I’m dead set on eating this way for good now, because without daily carbs, I haven’t been feeling bloated. Without sugar, I haven’t been getting weird cravings. I was never in to dairy in a big way, but I’m mildly lactose intolerant, so I won’t miss it at all.

I’ll still have a pizza now and then, and the odd frozen yoghurt or chocolate of course – but only for 10% of the time, I’d say. I’ll still go to the movies and order a popcorn every other week. But I want to eat like this every day. Back to basics, close to the earth, simple and unprocessed. For now! It’s an ongoing adventure, this health quest thing. Yesterday afternoon I was in a bicycle shop and I was like… “I could totally be a cyclist.” As long as we keep trying and keep active, I think we’ll all do alright.

But come now guys, you don’t need me to tell you that vegetables, salad, lean protein, water and exercise is the way to eat and lose weight for good. Hope you enjoyed the reminder. And if you’re gonna tease health conscious people when you’re eating mac n cheese or chocolate, remember that most health-kick people have usually felt the hard side of eating those empty foods every day for years… and we have no desire to feel that way about ourselves again. AND if you’re one of those “I can eat all the junk I want and always stay healthy and feel great” people – I am genuinely and completely happy for you, I am. Pretty please remember that you need not have a high BMI or even be overweight to have cholesterol issues. We all need our yearly checks to ensure that we’re doing right by our bodies. Keep checking those numbers – all of us! Have a happy, healthy weekend guys! This photo of me taken by Keri Bainborough yesterday, and I love it (and her)

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31 is the new 21

I turned 31 yesterday and I’m so excited and relieved. When you turn 30, there’s all this pressure to be new, improved, changed and suddenly mature. Your 20s are flipping hard, and Graeme and I did it with two babies and then toddlers in tow. Somehow. We started playing house from the age of 23, and at 23 you don’t even know a single thing, never mind how run a life properly. We grew, we learned and through all of it we never let go of each other. I’m grateful. I’m proud of us. 8 years and 2 cities later, we have our solid family unit; a beautiful home, established careers and a mountain of things we still want to achieve. Like everything finally fits. So here are a few reasons why I think that 31 is the new 21.

1. I can barely remember who was at my 21st ten years ago, and I’m hardly in touch with most of them anymore. People who I thought were my BEST, forever friends. While most of my current besties are from my childhood, I think you make your solid friends in your late twenties, and another group after you’ve had kids. Friendships change, careers move at different paces and having a family shifts your priorities. When I say “shift”, imagine a construction site and a very large bulldozer pushing your old priorities off a cliff. In my 20s, I let go of BEST friends who weren’t even friends at all. There’s sort of a “ek vat nie kak nie” attitude that comes in your late 20s and you realize that not all friendships will survive these years. And that’s okay!

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2. You have more money. Scraping by in your 20s and sending your parents please call mes to help with your rent is something that most of us went through. The best of us. In your 20s you learn about credit and savings and investing and interest rates, insurance and bonds and taxes. You make some pretty expensive mistakes. I remember I BLEW my first credit card when I was 20 like why would you even give a 20 year old a credit card. I spent years tidying up my credit record and then years trying to build credit to qualify to buy a house. In your 30s everything sort of evens out, you might stop living month to month and debits off your account no longer break your heart. Sometimes.

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3. I am personally in better shape right now than I was in my 20s. I eat right. I care. I train. I run. In my 20s it was all big macs and 24 hour steers and now it’s all juices and water and salads and wholewheat everything. I never cared about my health, I was like WHATEVER I’M YOUNG I’LL EAT WHAT I WANT and now I’m like “Okay so I really want to live a long and healthy life and not get colon cancer.” I’ve also become more responsible. I used to party like a crazy girl and now I’m like “WHAT IS THIS 3 DAY HANGOVER.” Seriously – what is that?!

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4. Your soul sprouts. I was pretty selfish in my 20s with very little regard for others, the earth or consequence. In your 20s your heart will break. You’ll disappoint yourself, and others. You’ll gain an awareness of others that you didn’t think possible. Only when your heart is truly and completely broken will it be vulnerable and susceptible enough to comprehend how you’ve affected others. There’s a sensitivity and humbleness that arrives in your 20s somewhere, and you’ll never shake it. It will make you a better, more sensitive and caring human being.

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5. Your career will change maybe three times. You might not be working in the field that you studied and by now you’ve probably realized that your degree means very little in the greater scheme of experience. I made monumental professional mistakes in my 20s. I took jobs I didn’t really want, I worked insane hours and I said yes to a lot of things that I should have walked away from. You learn that passion is the very core of any kind of success, and you will never succeed at anything unless your heart is in it. At my 21st, I had just left my Journalism studies and I was working in an old age home and night shift at a hospital’s Emergency Unit. I wanted to be a nurse, and work in pediatrics. I wasted two entire years in the medical field, which I would eventually walk away from. I worked as a TV producer and Multimedia Manager until I found what I was passionate about. You will never feel as confused, lost and desperate as you do in your 20s. Eventually you’re like

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6. By the time you reach your 30s you’ve developed your personal style. Sure it might change later, but you start to build a wardrobe. You ignore trends and fashion and focus on yourself, dressing for your body shape and investing in good quality, timeless garments. What looks good in a magazine or on your best friend won’t necessarily suit you. You discover which colours and fabrics and cuts flatter you. I’ve thrown and given away heaps of clothes over the years and I’ve learned that it’s better to buy one expensive item a month than 4 cheap ones that won’t last three washes and definitely not to the next season. You go from cheap clothes to good clothes like

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7. For some of us, we learn about motherhood in our 20s. You learn a love beyond your comprehension or understanding. Your heart and soul leaves your body and probably never comes back. You become a nurturer, not just with your own kids but with all others. You will never walk past a crying child and you will appreciate and understand humanity in a much deeper and connected sense. Motherhood is amazing. It will test, grow, fulfill and break you.

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8. You will fall in love. With yourself. Your body, your heart, your personality. You’ll accept all your own flaws and setbacks and mistakes. You’ll work through your dark bits and you’ll reach a point where you don’t need recognition or validation. There’s a confidence that emerges somewhere along the line that will really change your life. You’ll start saying no to things, you’ll stand tall in your convictions and you’ll appreciate yourself for who you are. I was really insecure in my 20s and I wanted everyone to like me, agree with me, stand by me. As you grow, your confidence does too.

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I usually get sad around birthdays. Another year of life cut short. A year less with my children, and theirs. Another year closer to losing loved ones, but today… I feel good. Relaxed. Like my wild spirit has silenced and evolved in to a deeper consciousness and understanding of everything around us. I feel… satisfied. Now that all those BIG boxes are ticked, I’m excited to start enjoying life more. I want to travel and expand my studies and keep learning about myself and our beautiful world. I want to kick back and really enjoy my husband and focus more on him and watch him go through his own journey. I love that man so much. He fills my heart with a thousand sunny days, ice cream cones, forests and sunsets. I want to watch my children be children and spend less time consumed by my to do lists and deadlines. I want to write books and stories and poems. I feel ready for anything right now and I really do believe that 31 is the new 21, at least today, right now. Happy birthday to me, and happy it is indeed.

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A TV interview about juicing on kyknet, Flits tv

Last night I did a little live skype interview with Kyknet, for their program called Flits. I am NOT very articulate in Afrikaans, but you can watch the clip here if you’re keen! Thanks so much to Kyknet (en jy Bibi haas) for the interview. It was really fun and I’m glad that more people are getting curious about this juicing business! If you’re in to juices or smoothies, the health benefits are incredible. Do it!

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