Every part of you is just another part of me.
I haven’t written you boys a nice letter lately; mostly because I’ve been so busy hanging out with you. I wonder when you guys will start reading these posts. Maybe you’re young men now. Or teenagers. Or fathers. Well, right now Noah: You’re six years old and you joined a new school this year. Your ‘forever’ school where you’ll be ’til you’re ‘big’ (standard five / grade 7) You had a pretty tough few weeks settling in, but you’re finally back to your ass-kicking, bouncy, happy, cheerful, chatty and bright self. You hang around mostly with girls and I’ll mention their names in case you remember or still know them: Claire, Ella, Fin and Ryan. And then with Dylan, Sam and Alfie too. That is sort of your squad and you guys are the coolest.
Benjamin you’re 5 next month and DYING to finish “baby school” and get to Grade R. You’re doing so well at art and your head sucks up information like a thirsty desert. Every day you have a new piece of information and you get SO upset when I drive you to school because you insist that my car is killing the earth and making holes in the Ozone layer. You love to sing. You love to watch television (Paw Patrol) and tell Noah that you just want to relax. You HATE it that Noah wants to play games like 24/7 when all you want to do is sleep late, watch TV and eat melted cheese on toast with tomato sauce. Mostly I think you’re missing out on solid friendships right now. At your school, all the kids are going to other schools next year. You’re really excited to meet your new, “forever” friends at big school. I’m so excited FOR you.
Noah right now you have 5 loose teeth and you’re about to lose a couple. Bunny (do I still call you Bunny?) we’re planning your 5th birthday party right now, which is obviously a Paw Patrol theme. You used to be obsessed with Spiderman, then Dora, then George in Peppa Pig and now it’s Marshall in Paw Patrol.
We’ve just come out of Winter over here, so right now you guys are really loving getting out the house and in to the forest, beach and and park. We’re doing a lot of gardening and planting vegetables – which you both love. Daddy just made you a big swing in the front garden with ropes tied to the bottom so you can pull each other and let go really fast. Do you remember that? Jack loves pulling you guys on the swing too.
I wonder what else you’ll remember about right now. Your tiny childhood. Your teachers, your friends, your school, your home. Do you remember the “N” and “B” lights I bought you for your bedroom? Do you remember us going on dates to the movies and sitting in the “red chairs”? Getting ice creams with flakes and browsing the toy shops? Do you remember baking muffins and cupcakes and me making you clean the lounge every afternoon. Do you remember all the times you got in to trouble for wetting the floor in the bathroom or the dogs always eating your shoes and me getting really mad. Do you remember climbing the olive trees in the garden, because pretty soon you’ll be too big to do it.
I miss you. I miss you being this small. Even though you aren’t big yet – it still hurts… knowing that you’ll grow up one day. You still believe everything I say and you believe in all the cool things like tooth fairies and Father Christmas and magic. All you want to do it play and pretend and make and create things and dream and listen to stories and colour and draw and eat sweets and learn. You’re so energetic and feisty and hungry for life, like every day is a brand new ADVENTURE filled with fun and excitement. Do you remember that?
I want you to know that whatever is going on for you right now – you were once a little boy with scraped knees and a heart filled with joy, happiness and energy. And I adore you.
Mommy bunny x